How to Recover From a Lost Childhood?
Question by Ophelia: How to recover from a lost childhood?
Ever since I was 9, my life has been going downhill for me. I was adoptedd at 10 months because my mother was a dug addict and diabetic, schetzofrenic, and poor. My father was unknown. My parents told me when I was about 8 or 9. I began stealing from my family, having little run aways, and having sex with boys my age at nine years old. At 10, I was molested by my brothers friend who was 16, and my 22 year old couisen, what seems very close to every day for about a year. In the 7th grade, my friends in school outed me for being gay, without my consent. I was bullied all the time, harrased, chased after school, threats and rocks thrown at my house… untill the 9th grade, where I started fighting back, and eventually was kicked out of school. That’s when I really started getting bad.
I was kicked out of vocational school before I was kicked out of public school, because I was drinking and experimenting with drugs. I was kicked out of two more schools because I was being caught doing drugs. all in the 9th grade, kicked out of 4 schools for the same reason… in the 10th grade, I was sent to an intensive lockdown residential treatment facility for 130 adolescent boys. It was hard, feeling extreemly institutionalized. It was misery, for 2 and a half years. I’ve tried killing myself as ways to cry for help, I’ve ran away to NYC for days… I began having dangerous sex with uncountable men in residential. About 40 in 2 years. I becam addicted to pleasing men through sex, but hated myself after it.
After barely completing the program, I was sent to a grouphome, because its not safe for me to go home. Now, 18 and senior in hs, I find myself depressed as I ponder through the lost years… looking at old classmated from middleschool, going to prom, laughing with family and friends… and I don’t have that oppertunity. Senior photos, even a graduation ceremony is not available for me. What do I do? It hurts so bad inside.
Best answer:
Answer by Kal Alvar
I wasn’t going to answer your question because I didn’t know what to do. But then I read your last sentance, and it made me think of the years I’ve wasted and thrown away. Not nearly as much as you, and not nearly as bad as you. But it hurt a lot, and I hate to see others go through this, because I know that I was lucky with my experiences and I know there are people like you who aren’t so lucky.
How I want to recover from my wasted years is to have a nice, caring family, and provide for my children, which I will have, and see them have what I didn’t. To see someone have all the oppurtunity I missed out on would be the most satisfying thing ever.
It’s good that you’re thinking, you need to find something or some way that would make you feel at peace with yourself. Ask yourself, how could I make up for what I’ve done?
Answer by Clair
ive been through a tough childhood too. not as tough as yours but i can see where youre coming from and i have a very simple answer.
its about looking at life through a different perspective. what im saying is you have to leave the past behind you in order to make a great future for yourself. i find that by being greatfull for the things god has given you opens my eyes. i try to be thankful everyday that god gave me arms and legs and sight. even though you have been through tough times youre still only young and you have the opportunity to go to school.
think of all the kids that dont have this opportunity in 3rd world countrys and kids that are blind or missing an arm or a leg god bless them. but youre lucky so be thankful and be happy
please answer my question thanks
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